I had written a whole letter to prove my truthfulness, to prove my sincerity, to prove my loyalty but I didn’t send that to you.
You know why?
Because I have heard that truth doesn’t need any explanations.
But again I was mulling over this and tried to click the send button in order to avoid this orthodoxical quote, because for me you’re much more important than these wordings & sayings, your importance just can’t be described in words.
But then I heard a line from my mother’s mouth that
“Never try to prove your point forcefully in any relationship, it might get accepted for that moment but doesn’t last longer.”
And then I asked to myself that if my love, my admiration and my affections wasn’t enough…do you think your words will matter????
So I stopped myself.
You may realize one day that there was someone who truly loved you, respected you, admired you and in return he got doubts, incomplete wishes, broken bonding and the alone hand………..as you left him.
Though I’ll always love you unconditionally, I’ll always try to brighten your name as much as I can, My work will always try to make you proud and put a sweet smile on your face. In return I will never ask you for anything, not even a single hug, because getting nothing is far much better than a broken bonding.
Sardonically, “Sometimes your pain is the source of other’s happiness” and that’s why for some people it’s fun to see you fall apart from your beloved ones. (Well, that’s good though, at least you got to see the true faces behind those smiley masks of those people). Unfortunately they are the very those people who have never valued their own relationships.
And to those catalysts who were willing to see this broken bonding, I can’t blame you people, instead I should thank you for making me realize that I wasn’t that much important for him as I was thinking.
(Though at one moment I was taking you people for granted, because I was loving you guys also as much as I love and respect him but….)
In the midst of so many ambiguities and dilemmas, whether i should go to him and prove my true affections or i should believe on famous old saying called just let it go, if it’s meant to be it will come back to you, don’t rush.
You know what??
One thing i have learned from life :- Sometimes you have to fight for what we love and care about and sometimes the fight is between our mind and our heart. It’s the fight between what we feel and what we know , believe me it’s the worst fight you can ever imagine of.
Sometimes all we have to do is finding the courage and strength to let it go, let it fly, let it be free. Yes, definitely it takes a lot of pain and big stone onto our heart but we have to do this just for the sake of getting back that lovable one into our lives. in other words it’s the cost we have to pay for our beloved ones.
So, As the old cliché goes i did the same……..and now hope one day that darkness of doubt may vanished out by the brightness of my affections. Hope …… the positive hope… Amen.
Saurabh Kumar 